The DOs and DON’Ts of Jealousy and Being Possessive…

I understand how confusing women can be when it comes to jealousy, being possessive, and how you react to another guy’s apparent interest in her. It’s an extremely delicate matter. It makes it even more difficult because women seem to be all different when it comes to these things.

We aren’t. We all react pretty much the same depending upon the specific circumstances and the man with whom the circumstances surround.

There is hope and a happy medium. Women are finicky creatures, but if you really do want to know how to handle us, read my words carefully and pay attention. You MUST follow these guidelines, or you will wind up either losing her, being cheated on, or fighting all the time with the one you love the most.

1. Yes. We DO want you to feel a bit possessive of us. We want to know that you care if you lose us. Notice I said FEEL. We want you to FEEL some jealousy when another man hits on us. DO feel it.

2. DO NOT, however, make a scene, start a fight, act insecure, or pretty much do anything about it unless the guy becomes disrespectful TOWARD US, not you. You will know when WE believe this is happening because, PAY ATTENTION, we will tell you. Do you have a hot girlfriend? I’m sure she is, or why would you want to be with her? If you have a hot girlfriend, other men are going to notice her. Guess what, my boy? She appreciates a bit of attention from other people than you, sometimes. It makes her feel good about herself and makes her feel sexy. DO act proud that she’s with you. DO casually place your arm around her and smile, proudly, that they appreciate her hotness. DO, PLEASE, DO trust her to handle herself, and them, with dignity and pride in these situations. Now, if she signals her annoyance and she is indicating that you do something about it, they have probably gone over board. When this happens, gently but firmly reprimand them and steer her away. That’s all. Get her out of there, but you DO NOT need to cause a fight.

3. DO let her know regularly that you would be devastated if you lost her. Tell her that she means a lot to you. Tell her you wouldn’t want go through life without her. Let her know, on a regular basis, that you love her and never want her to go away. Do this in a manly, dignified, non-clingy way.

4. Now this is probably the most important one. Absolutely DO NOT EVER place blame upon her. DO NOT make her feel as though she is being slutty, or flirtatious, or trying to sleep with other men. DO NOT subject her to your insecure feelings, or jealous fits. DO NOT harass, humiliate, or embarrass her because of your feelings. Why? Because you will lose her. Let me explain. There is a power, invisible, almost magical in nature, that does and has been proven to exist. It is called the power of suggestion. IF YOU SUGGEST that she might cheat on you, or leave you for someone else… if you suggest this enough times… trust me when I say that you will make it happen. And guess what? It will be YOUR fault, NOT HERS.

5. DO NOT grab her phone and start nosing through it. DO NOT take her purse and trifle through it. DO NOT make physical inspections of her just because she’s not been in your sight for a few hours. All of these things are signs of insecurity and serious mental issues. A bit of a turn off for most women. If you act this way, you are going to lose her. I’m sorry to break it to you, but the tighter you try to squeeze, the more she will just want to be free.

This is not okay.

6. DO, at ALL times, behave as if you believe she would NEVER be unfaithful to you, until the day that you find out she isn’t. Even if you truly think she is being inappropriate. Even if you suspect with all of your heart that she just might leave you. Guess what? If she is going to do it, you can do nothing to stop it anyways. When it happens, deal with the situation however you need to, whether you leave her, or forgive her, or she leaves you. Until that point, DO give her the benefit of the doubt. If you can’t do that, then you DO NOT belong together in the first place.

The Playmate Gate

Cook to impress your lady! It can be simple, yet taste gourmet…

Hot, but not exactly wise…

There are so many guys out there who still believe that they don’t need to learn to cook because it’s a woman’s thing. That is such Bologna it isn’t even funny. Seriously guys, if you know how to cook just one or two meals, and cook them well, you have no idea the power to impress you hold in your hands. Gourmet doesn’t have to involve all kinds of cooking techniques you can’t even spell or pronounce. It’s quite easy to make a very simple, yet elegant and tasty meal that will impress the panties off of any woman.

Fun, but not necessary.

One of my favorite date ideas is to go to his house and watch him cook while we sip wine. It’s so much nicer than going out, because you are alone, in an intimate setting. You can light some candles, drink wine, and get to know each other. If a man can cook, he doubles in value, to be honest, because I LOVE tasty food that I don’t have to cook myself.

Remember the scene in Spider man 3?

Harry’s cute cooking antics nearly win him Spidey’s girl!

So, just a few things you should be sure to have:

A big pot with lid.

A small pot with lid.

A large skillet with lid.

A good spatula, wooden spoons, pasta utensil, ladle, and BBQ utensils.

A cheese grater.

A colander (to drain noodles).

A chopping board.

A mixing bowl.

And some food stuff to always have handy:

J. Lee Roy’s Cookin Seasonings.

Garlic Salt.

Pasta.

Frozen veggies (broccoli, green beans, corn, etc).

Parmesan Cheese.

Eggs.

Pepper Jack Cheese.

Sour Cream.

So, you get the idea. I’ll be releasing a cook book for guys who don’t cook, very soon. It will have lots of very simple, tasty, gourmet-like meals meant to impress, with little skill, and even a low budget. If you know what you’re doing, cooking for your date can save money, too.

So, guys, put on your aprons and break out a new skill. Cooking. It’s not just for chicks. Good food can be the way to our hearts, too, you know!

By the way, my first book has been published, finally, if you are interested. It’s called The Insider’s Secrets to Dating Beautiful Women, available for 6.99 at the Amazon book market in Kindle format.

Drop by my new site, I’m trying to get off the ground, where I hope to make it a comfortable place where guys can get advice from beautiful girls about dating, love, sex, and more.

Women want you to be yourself! Or do they?

We forever are hearing someone say we should be ourselves. Just be you… but should we, really?

This is a controversial subject, I know. Well, my biggest focus with The Playmate Gate is to give guys a good idea of what women really want from them. To allow them in on the inside secrets that women usually don’t disclose, easily if at all. My content is, above all, honest and without sugar-coating or a chaser. If anyone reading this takes it the wrong way, or get’s mad and offended, I can’t apologize. My information is aimed at the portion of my readers who want the truth, because, face it, knowledge is power. If you know what women truly want, you are more likely going to be able to provide it.

I can’t honestly speak for all beautiful women, but being one myself, and being raised with two beautiful sisters, then going on to working in clubs and modeling, etc, I’ve been around beautiful women all of my life. I have a pretty decent idea of what the majority of them are after.

That being said, if you have taken in the advice somewhere that women want you to “be yourself”, well, that should be examined. We absolutely do not want you to lie, pretend to be something you are not, deceive us, give us false hopes, or anything along those lines. So, in that aspect, “be yourself” does ring true. Let’s put that a bit differently, though. Don’t be someone else. Don’t pretend.

So, having that part cleared up, let’s move on to actually “being yourself”.

Honestly? No. Women do not want you to be yourself. Now, keep reading, even if I just pissed you off. Give me a chance to completely ruin your day, not just 5 minutes of it. I kid! Don’t close the page.

What women truly want is for you to be clean, polite, smell wonderful, witty and funny, intelligent, suave, brave, strong, sensitive, chivalrous, sexy, heroic, and be able to whip up a delicious meal on the fly. Think. In all honesty, how many of these things describe the real you? When you are home, alone, in your room, no one there, are you any of these things? Maybe one or two. Probably none. I would wager that about 75% of the guys who read this, while in the privacy of their own home, are smelly, gassy, burping, snorting, cartoon viewing, gross joke cracking, beer drinking, women ogling, scared of the dark, t.v. dinner chowing, rude beasts. You may not even realize it. Maybe you think that if a women wants to be with you, she must suffer your bodily noises and be understanding if you ogle other women, when she catches you, which she usually will, because most of you are really not as sly as you believe you are.

What women truly do NOT want:

To smell or hear your bodily functions.

You to crack rude, gross jokes to us and then act as though we are inferior for not finding them funny.

To have you treat us with disrespect in front of your buddies.

To allow your buddies to disrespect us, behind our backs, or right in front of us.

To detect any fear in you.

You to ogle women who are not us, ever, not even in private, and we’d like you to reassure us of this.

To be condescended to or made to feel inferior in any way.

You to gloat if we argue and somehow you win. We’d prefer never to hear of it again. Ever.

You to guzzle a beer, make that annoying AAAAAHHHHHHHH sound, and then belch as long and loud as possible.

To sum up, no, women absolutely do not want you to “be yourself” if that involves anything on the above list and more. But let me please remind you of something, before indignation causes any exploding heads.. we girls work very hard to be beautiful, sexy, smart, good in bed, good in the kitchen, nice to your buddies, welcoming to your family, etc. Reverse the situation and tell me, honestly, do you really believe that any of what we present to you is our true, unaltered self? It works both ways. When you adore someone, you do your best to be the YOU that turns them on and makes them happy. Personally, I love being the hottie that turns my man on every night. When I’m at home, alone, I’m without make-up, wearing sweats and tank tops, glasses, and clicking away on my lap top with my hair a mess. I would never want to “be myself” all of the time, how boring would that be?! And as far as anyone knows? My body does nothing gross and makes no gross sounds or smells. Period.

So, don’t try to be something you truly are not and don’t be deceitful or dishonest. Just DO keep some aspects of you to yourself when you are around women. It’s okay. You aren’t hurting or depriving yourself in any way, I don’t care what the professionals tell you 😉

 

The Playmate Gate